


Sherlollipops - All About the John Tent

by MizJoely



Series: 221 Sherlollipops [121]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Humor, Johntent, Sherlolly - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2016-01-15
Packaged: 2018-05-14 00:46:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5723236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizJoely/pseuds/MizJoely
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John. In a tent. With very noisy neighbors in a tent of their own. It's all for a case, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sherlollipops - All About the John Tent

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ditsypersephone](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ditsypersephone/gifts).



> _ditsypersephone said: Note to self: It’s either 100% Johntent or don’t even bother with anything at all. 100% Johntent every time, all the time. Johntent Johntent Johntent. Even if it’s just a random John in a tent. JOHNTENT!_
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _And I said: The story inspired by the above tumbr post came about because a member of a certain ship decided to comment on the lack of John in a Sherlolly story. Therefore a story’s ‘johntent’ has become a bit of a tumblr in-joke for us sherlollians. Needless to say members of that certain ship get annoyed about what is definitely a joke. Now you know the origin of this slightly M rated fic and if you wish to avoid reading it, please feel free to do so. I know some folks want me to keep the fandom wank out of my fics but that’s not always possible, sorry. Also I can never resist a pun, so there's that, too!_

The noises from the next tent over were unbelievably loud. If he didn’t know it was just Sherlock and Molly faking it for the case, he’d storm over there and tell them to shut up. Then it occurred to him that, wait, he actually WAS supposed to be part of this whole thing, right? Wouldn’t it be MORE in character for him to storm over and tell them off than to suffer in silence? Wouldn’t want to let the wanker they were staking out to get the wind up and hoof it. In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he convinced himself that this was exactly why Sherlock was calling Molly’s name out so loudly, and why she was moaning and mewling like a bloody porn film starlet. They WANTED him to come over and shout at them, and if he didn’t do so he would hear about it from Sherlock in the morning. Especially if it caused the suspect to bolt.

Ugh. The things he did for his friends. It was a good thing Mary was home with baby Rosie, or else she’d be shoving him out of the tent and scolding him for not having figured it out sooner. “It’s what I would have done, John, why didn’t you?” he could practically hear her saying in fond exasperation.

Fine. Up he got, out of his nice, cozy sleeping bag. Shivering a bit as the cold air hit his skin – why hadn’t he kept his coat on as Sherlock had advised? – he lowered the zip on the flap and stepped outside.

Sixteen steps later he was in front of Sherlock and Molly’s tent, reaching for the zip and wincing at the falsely orgasmic cries of ‘Yes! Yes! Oh God, Sherlock, YES!’ coming from the petite pathologist’s lips. He grinned at the thought of how the two of them would wink at him, Molly probably stifling a giggle as he pretended to yell at them for being so noisy.

“All right, you two, that’s e...nough...” The words started out as a bellow as he unzipped the tent and thrust his head in between the flaps, but ended on an incredulous near-whisper as he stared at the sight that met his eyes. A sight he fervently wished to unsee immediately, since it mostly consisted of Sherlock’s bare ass moving in an unmistakable rhythm, while an equally bare female leg – Molly’s – was hooked around his waist. Her perky breasts were also clear to see, as was the fact that the two of them were most certainly NOT faking their enthusiasm. Or anything else.

“Piss off John, can’t you see we’re busy?” Sherlock grunted without turning around. Molly’s face was already red with exertion, but John thought he could see her cheeks darkening in the moonlight streaming in over his shoulders. 

“Um, yeah, right...sorry, I’ll just...um, go. Now. Sorry,” he babbled as he hurriedly backed out the way he’d come. ( _Ooh, terrible choice of words, John,_  he heard an inner voice chiding him. One that sounded suspiciously like Mary. That near-chuckle was definitely her!) He pulled up the zip to the entrance and ran, not walked, the short distance back to his own tent. Where he spent the rest of the night in mortified silence as Molly and Sherlock finally quieted...and then began again about an hour later.

One thing was for certain: he was never, EVER going on an overnight case with the two of them again!

**Author's Note:**

> A huge thanks to bkst-tutu1b over on tumblr, who also inspired this fic! Here's to great misunderstandings!
> 
> ALSO: I changed the baby's name to Rosie because of the S4 announcement. Squeee!


End file.
